If It’s Not One Thing

It has been quite some time since my last post and there are various reasons for this. First, we have been having huge troubles with the school district beginning back in May at our annual IEP. We are still doing battle with them and school is due to start in a few weeks. We have had 2 IEP meetings and a mediation which was less than useful and we have written numerous letters and made various calls in an effort to get the district to override the crazy idea of one power hungry woman that finds delight in playing with our son’s life. The main problem is that she is bent on sending him to another school that is significantly further from home, just because. We want him to remain at his current home school where there will be 2 cluster classes. Both of these classes are including kids through 4th grade and Parker is going into 5th. Our concern is what is in Parker’s best interest, not the whims of the EC director. She could have made the 2 classes cover all grades through 6th grade and we wouldn’t have a problem, but, she chose to make up the classes in a way that would leave out our son and force him to another school. Even though we have had 2 doctors write letters to her specifying the need for him to be close to home, she is ignoring medical advice and doing everything as she wants since she has the power.

We don’t have proof, but, my gut tells me and my husband that all this fuss and bother is her way to force us to send Parker to the all special needs school. We feel this is her motivation due to the fact that we have not experienced a meeting without the subject of this school being brought up. Even when it is not appropriate to bring up this other school, it is still thrown at us as if to say if we would only acquiesce all would be right with the world, at least her world. The heck with Parker and his best interest and well being! What she doesn’t know about me or even I dare say human nature is that when I feel pushed, I push back. I don’t like feeling forced into a situation. When someone tries so hard to direct me in a particular direction, I have to ask what the motivation behind this push is about. To be honest, I had thought about the idea of Parker going to this special school at some point, but, with all the garbage we have had to endure with this one woman for the past couple of years, I would not even consider the idea anymore ever.

In any case, I wrote my local representative in the state house and he has been wonderful. He called me at home and listened to the story of what was going on and asked how he might help us. He has been talking to the superintendent of the district on our behalf and is continuing to follow up with us by email. Even if his help doesn’t move these people to do the “right” thing, I will forever be grateful to this man for at least caring and showing an interest in some of the people he represents.

So while all this crap has been ongoing for us and taking up so much of my time, another situation arose. I had a mammogram and as usual it came back that I needed to get another one to determine if something might be wrong. This happens almost every year and I frankly gave it very little thought. I didn’t feel I had the time for this right now, but it is what it is. After my second mammogram, I was told there was a lump of concern. Once again, I did not feel alarmed because this happens all the time for me. I have been to the surgeon so many times for biopsies that I figured just another biopsy to get through and get past for another year. After my biopsy I really put it out of my head because the surgeon said it did not have the appearance of cancer and because I have so many cysts all the time and it just looked like another cyst. So I scheduled a return appointment which turned out to be the day after Parker’s sleep study where I did not get to sleep. I got home from the study around 8:30 AM and was supposed to be at my appointment at 12:15. All I wanted to do was go to bed and sleep and decided that this appointment would have to wait until I could drive awake. When I called to reschedule, I was told that the wait for another appointment would be about 3 weeks and I said fine. I also asked if someone could give me the results and that would get this minor issue off my plate. Around 1:30 the doctor called and told me that she does not like to give test results over the phone, but after explaining my night to her and the situation with my son she understood why I cancelled my appointment. Next, she said that the lump was cancer and all I could say was,”Oh crap!” I must say that her words were completely unexpected and completely a surprise. So that is where I am today. I have a stage 1 breast cancer and will be having a mastectomy in a few weeks and reconstruction will begin at the time of the surgery. Hopefully I will not need chemotherapy, but, that won’t be known until about a week after my surgery.

Now I really need the school district to get off my case! We won’t have enough people able to be carting Parker to a school 20 minutes each way while I am recovering and I have been told I won’t be able to lift him for at least 4-6 weeks. I will need to rely on family and our CNA, Bria to do all the lifting of Parker and for taking him to school and therapy. If school will be so far, we may need to pull him out of school for awhile and that is not right. I am not above using my cancer card to get what is needed for my little guy.

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About Lori Linn

Besides writing, Lori has been an Actress both on stage and in film, is currently a member of SAG and AFTRA, and is a credentialed teacher as well as her full time job as a mom.
This entry was posted in Children's book, novel, non-fiction, seizures, epilepsy, VNS, special needs, disability, IEP, Mowat Wilson Syndrome, special needs author and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to If It’s Not One Thing

  1. Lori I am so so sorry for all that you have been going through. Please take care of yourself, and remember to stay strong, everybody, not just Parker, needs you! I pray for you daily, but I will put in a strong word to protect you and keep you safe during this especially stressful time. On the brighter side, you’ll have the best boobs in town! I’m certainly not making light of this, I thank God you have the support and comfort of all those who love and care for you nearby. Let Lee and your mom take over Parker’s cause for awhile, trust them to do the right thing. You need this time to gather your strength before the surgery. As always, God Bless you and your family. Love, Laurie

  2. Kami says:

    I agree with your friend Laurie 100%! You need to be well to take care of Parker – now is a good time to find out who you can rely on! My aunt was just diagnosed in May and is going thru chemo now – too many people I know have breast cancer now! My husband works on cancer and inflammation drugs, I will tell him to hurry up and make something good!!!
    The school thing is just HORRIBLE! But it also sounds like you are being an excellent advocate for your son and doing all the right things.
    Good luck with everything! I will be thinking about you!
    Kami

  3. Bria says:

    You are such a strong and brave woman. You have truly shown that the past few weeks since your diagnosis. You truly are an inspiration to me. I hope this school situation can get resolved quickly. Parker shouldn’t have to suffer because some hateful woman likes to play boss. Please remember I am here if you need me, and you are in my thoughts and prayers!

  4. Gwen says:

    When I read this blog, my mind went into so many places.
    First, to pray for God to carry you through the surgery that you are about to face.
    Next, without even knowing all that has been taking place within your district, I can so relate with the various battles. Often times this stuff in regards to our kids becomes so personal on behalf of others in a power trip way. It is like some choose to go for the kill. I am praying that God will move the mountain that keeps getting in your way. I pray that the district will wake up and FORGET trying to look like the almighty powerful one and just do what is right.
    There must be something about this mediation stuff. We had one principal to just outright tell us to go ahead because we would not succeed. That was not the deciding factor, we put him up before God and know that he will be taken care of whenever God chooses and others involved. Although your mediation was not successful, a time will come while you are not giving up that it will be.
    Praying for you and your son. Praying that God will uplift you and for some miraculous turn of events will take place in a positive way.
    You are a fighter and the journey is now about to become even stronger!

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